Last Chance at Two

For some reason, Cooper's birthday tomorrow has me totally sad.  Its been a while, a rather long while with two toddlers in my house.  First it was Em and Coop, then Coop and Harper.  Now, it will just be Harper, all by her lonesome and I will have two preschoolers.  I'm not sure how that happened- them growing up so fast on me, but they have.  I wanted to take one last picture with my 2 year-old little guy before he becomes a proper boy, but as I looked at the picture, I realized that at some point in the past, on some unmarked day when I wasn't paying attention, he already turned into that Big Boy.  He is no longer squidgy and uttering incoherent words in my general direction.  He's having conversations (even if I'm the only one who understands what we're talking about).  He rides a pedal-less bike with ease and he can do so many things that state his growth and independence.  

I didn't understand people who used to tell me that boys and girls were different.  I thought they only "got different" around the time they walked into my Grade 6 classroom- smelling differently, acting differently, having different motivations and goals.  But from the moment I found out I was pregnant with this second child, I knew he was different from his sister.  When he was an infant, his fussiness and refusal to sleep confirmed that he was most definitely not his food and sleep-loving sister.  When he started walking and would continually run into stationary objects, ones he had just run into, again I realized he was his own person, and all boy to boot.  And the sadness and nostalgia I feel is different as well.  I'm looking forward to Em growing up, to having her ask me to paint her nails or do her hair.  I look forward to the "girl days" we've just started enjoying.  But this boy of mine, it feels as if the older he gets, the more he wants his Dad, or uncles, instead of me.  It's rather sad since I know, I know in my bones, that this boy who only wanted his mamma for so long is slowly but surely becoming the man who will no longer want to sit and sleep next to me.  I know its proper and needs to happen, but as I realize with each passing stage how much more mature he is, how much more of a "boy" he is and the difference that distinction has, but for now, I'm in the same boat with so many other mothers across the centuries and continents who have wanted their little boys to stay "their little boy."

That said, whenever I get over the nostalgia, I will inevitably look at this handsome face and know that he'll be a good looking man one day... but not today.

 One year ago.

 I think this may be the last picture I have of my baby boy before he became a big kid.

And yes, I fully expect him to love cartoons and Michigan football as much when he's 30 as he does right now. :)